It's about ME...

It’s about ME

Years are passing by. Years have passed by. And how very clearly, I can recall the finest & the minutest details about myself. In last 4 decades there has been such a deep & strong evolution for me, which astonishes me to a great extent.

I remember myself as a child & and the years of childhood, which never seemed to be loaded with any kind of a systematic plan, in general, without a dream, a vision, an ambition or a passion.

It was the 70’s and 80’s of the century gone by. It was a normal upbringing and had a very simplistic childhood. Although being brought up in a city like Calcutta, one of the metropolitan tags on the Indian map, I somehow always found my world too limited, too restricted. Especially the 70’s, were like, few hundred meters around me, which was all. That was my world.

A small rented house, joint family of 10, a couple of neighbors, a nearby school, a small adjacent Shiva temple, a little further Ram temple on the way to the school and a small lane adjacent to our building, for the post school hours to play around. This was all for the first 10 years of my childhood. I was a decent student & always did well to make my parents proud during these years.  I still get ghost images of those days, an absolute carefree times, not even an effort to plan anything even for the next moment. Never knew what the destiny had stored in for me, from here.

The shifting to a newer bigger home, a high posh locality, in the early 80’s seems to me a very significant change which took place in my world. As like with everybody else, moving out and leaving behind the house, the school, the friends, was some task. I believe, it’s always like this. It’s never easy to get yourself detached, from what I always believed was my world for now and forever. It was a reluctant, a little uneasy shift.

But when I saw the new house, I would say, one of the most beautiful house I ever had, attached with a small terrace, in a complete new locality and absolutely peaceful compare to my previous experience of 10 years in a main road facing, 1^st floor house. When I saw the new place for the first time, uneasiness which developed because of the shift started getting dissolved a bit. May be could not express or actually experience and understand the feeling that time. But looking back, can now fully understand what was going on within me. There was an acceptance. There was a liking. There was a feel of getting upgraded. A feel of luxury. An understanding of the growth family business has made which resulted in this shift. Somehow, the inner conflict got diluted a bit and started looking forward to some excitement in store. The school was just the next door, a big park few steps away, fantastic people to stay with as neighbors. No sooner could made friends with many of my age in the same building. I would term this, the 12 years, as one of the most exciting phases of my growing. Somehow, every moment is a memory I still cherish and remains a treasure in the pages of my life. 

The medium of learning changed from Gujrati to English in the new school, though it being basically a school managed by Gujrati Trust, but all the subjects were taught in English, besides the first language, Gujrati. Thankfully, sooner could overcome & manage this change of learning medium and continued to be a decent student with decent results year by year. I can say, that these years, actually formed a foundation for my future. I was always with greatest of the buddies whether in school or at home, with diversified talents, interest, capabilities. Always was with friends & colleagues, who were all, I can say, somewhat serious about studying hard, scoring good, be successful as a student, join family business or find a way to earn through some various other, offered and available opportunities. None, can I remember who was not serious about his life. Of course wouldn’t have noticed such things at the time of passing through those times, but looking back, all of these seems so meaningful, so relative, so much so arranged and is making complete sense now.

But somehow even after the first 10 years at the new place, something was a-miss. I still can’t remember any such incident, a discussion, a pep talk, a serious thought provoking moment, which can point that I did carry some ambition in my life. A dream to fulfill. A vision to achieve. A Goal to strive for. A well-crafted path. Nothing. Absolutely Nothing.

And I do find it utterly surprising. No plans for life, for future till the age of 18 or 20. On the contrary, as we see today, there is a specific, a very clear view and understanding amongst the students of the age 13 & above. By the time they are 13 they are asked to choose their subject streams based on their interest, talent, capacity and future career prospects.

I do feel it quite strange for myself actually for not having enough future foresight to reach to a certain point in life. Yes, I do remember that to go for medicine or Engineering was the most sought after streams in those times. Based on good academic performance in STD X, I was encouraged and literally convinced successfully, by friends & family, to take up Science as my subject stream and eventually move in the direction of becoming an engineer someday. My dad, I remember, always used to tell me that become an engineer or a Doctor. Though never was he keen on our (me & my sisters’) day to day studies and academic progress, but he was always the first to put his hands on our year end results, would count the marks, and would say it’s not enough. Why so less or why the rank is 2^nd & not 1^st? So one thing was certain that he was very clear about what he wanted for & from his children, to perform & achieve.

But there was never ever any pressure to perform, or to prove; at least academically from any of the family members. Ultimately, the experience of keeping up in the Science stream proved to be sort of non-productive 4 years of my life. I kept on pursuing the same, even after when I couldn’t break through engineering entrances and eventually took up B.Sc. for the graduation.

Somehow, I was more inclined towards Management studies, Business administration. But once I decided to get into Science, I could never come out of it to pursue my interest towards the same. It’s not that, I was very keen to take up business studies that time, but few of my academic initiatives do point towards this interest at that time and un-excusably which was never put forward by me by way of strong demand or initiative. So no point in creating an excuse about that now. But one thing is for sure, that the study of Science, did teach me few beautiful aspects. It trained me with few wonderful virtues, which I strongly believe are rightfully justifiable to be attributed to my few years of studying Science. I developed a good habit of having a strong focus, intent listening and getting into the core of any problem. The why’s and how’s, established in me an inquisitiveness to go to the root of the problem, which keeps helping me even today to take me able decisions.

Once I was through the first 2 years of my studying in science, i.e. at the age of 20, somehow I feel the first real questions started breathing in my mind. May be that was the time I started getting a bit more serious about where was I heading in my life. I had no clue whatsoever. My close friends were already either into their family business or jobs. I could feel myself absolutely clueless. I could feel every moment of my life getting wasted. I was restless.  As the college had afternoon hours, I couldn’t think of attending dad’s office too. And honestly for the few days which I attended, I could never generate any interest whatsoever to look forward to repeatedly go to office. I kept of generating many excuses of not attending office.

Somehow, I see those 2 years, as the years, where I must have started thinking SOMETHING. Though with no clear vision of where I needed to head, but surely that was the time I felt the most miserable as regarding what I would like to do in future. With few friends, I tried getting into something different and something other than our regular family business. We tried software marketing, Selling of Computer hardware & accessories, Stock market investments. But, as the destiny holds, nothing actually worked. Though apparently, getting into stocks looked attractive and source of good money, but eventually failed.

And now the time for one more shift. Bigger than the one before. The decision to leave Calcutta & move to Bombay. My family had already invested into a home and an office space in Bombay few years back. Once again, a strong inner resistance. An absolute reluctance in leaving the comfort zone, fantastic friends, a very comfortable & easy life, good academic background which also created an identity for me.

How could I leave everything which was so good, comfortable & every bit predictable? And of course Bombay was always known to be most dynamic place to work, build a career and at the same time one of the most expensive cities to live and manage lifestyle. And to come out of the simplicity of Calcutta and stepping to match up with the smarter Bombay-ites was always going to be a huge task. So as was obvious, it was a big NO to leave Calcutta, at least for me and my Dad. But eventually the stronger will, insistence & willingness of my grandfather & my mom, won. And we decided to come to Bombay.

During the process of Yes’s and No’s for Bombay, I still remember, that there was that small little phase, where I did realize it was very important for me & it was high time, to leave Calcutta behind. Though it was not an easily acceptable proposition for me & was every bit difficult to come to harmonious terms with my inner and outer conflict. But one thing was for sure, that I did realize it very strongly that it was my time to get detached from this comfort zone. This comfort zone was pulling me into the well of darkness. I could feel myself getting nowhere by staying in Calcutta. I also remember, telling my friends, that “I see dark clouds over us. We are too attached, obsessed & dependent over each other to really break out and achieve something big in our lives. And my going to Bombay would pave way for everybody to grow”. I do remember saying this and hopefully my friends would still remember this and agree.

Coming to Bombay, now it’s been more than 22 years, I can say, that what was missing during my early years in Calcutta was challenges and struggle. None of which I had ever experienced. Not much of expectations around, could never prompt or encourage me to rise to a level higher than what I was standing on. Here, in a completely new atmosphere, limited help from the people around me, limited resources, I had no option but to face the same and prove my worth. Dad was 47 at that time, and for him to leave behind a well-established business and to plunge into the highly competitive business in Bombay was not easy. That was one of the reasons of his NO, as well. All the well-known, successful big people of our industry were in Bombay and to try and create our own space on their occupied land was not going to be easy. The early years in Bombay gave me freedom to think and put in my ideas into action. I was never averted to hard work and these years gave me chance to travel a lot on business to every nook and corner of the country where our business prospects were the best. With God’s grace & some good karmas of the past, Dad’s experience & hard work, ably supported by my uncle at Calcutta office and of course with little initial supportive efforts from my end, resulted in the success of our business in Bombay in few years. And then after, have never looked back.

Its 22 years for us in Bombay, now known as Mumbai. We are still very much a joint family. Business has grown and so do we all have, as responsible human beings. The years have taken away few of our family pillars, but the support, love and care from all within the family & friends, keeps us going.  

There is nothing actually I regret when I look back to the 3 phases (1970-1980; 1980-1992; 1992-today) of my life so far. But given a choice to re-live all these years, I may would like to change few of those times, moments, where I felt little lost. I would have pursued a parallel education in business management, which remained an unfulfilled dream. I would have spent more quality time with the people whom I lost on this journey.

To conclude with, I strongly believe, that it’s important to have an innocent childhood. It’s even more important to allow our children to think and craft their own ways. Let them experience what they would like to pursue. Failures doesn’t matter but the freedom from our side, to let them choose from available options & opportunities, may help them to minimize their regrets later, in their lives. 

THE MINDSET

THE MINDSET

All of a sudden, so many changes are happening at one time.
We have become a frozen witness to the chaotic sequence of events happening & changing, all at one time. And I wonder and feel astonished at the same time, that all that so called accumulated, possessed intellect, the wisdom & the collective experience fail to help in creating sense out of this chaos.

With every passing frame of strange & unpredictable slides of daily living, we see ourselves stepping out of these frames one by one, and find ourselves either moving away or being pushed away and thus getting dis-connected with the real time.
Somehow we seem to be not able to sustain and live in our every changing "New Present".

Questions arise in my mind,

• Did we lose our momentum?
• Do we lack ability to match with the pace of ever changing times?
• Are we not able to adjust, adopt or be comfortable with the new environment?

Doesn't everything seem to be too quick, too sudden, as if being caught off-guard, being caught unaware.?

I believe, the answer lies in understanding & getting into the deeper roots of “THE MINDSET”.

Where most of the common folks are failing and finding themselves being pushed out, is because of the “Mindset” they possess.
Most of the times, it’s easier to adapt to changing situations, changing generations; on physical terms; but quite a task to align with the change in mindset along the line of these changing times.

As a parent, we do always believe that we possess the greatest wisdom and intellect to drive our kids on the path to sure shot success & glory.
And in spite of this belief in ourselves, don’t we often find ourselves at cross-heads with our kids, specially dealing with them in their teens?

It’s not that the children are not matured, or least bothered about the world around them or about their own lives. On the contrary, they are full of aspirations, vision, dreams, fresh thoughts, newer ideas and have novel ways to put their ideas and plans to action.
But, most of the times, none of these manifestations & initiatives from their end, make any sense to us. Isn’t it?
We invariably and quite certainly have our own versions and push-over ideas to counter every words & deeds of theirs.

And here we create conflicts. 

We make matter more complex and complicated between the subjects concerned. And eventually, knowing that the force of current generation is far stronger than that of ours or of our times, we succumb. We retreat. We make an exit.
The only effort which could have created a win-win situation for both the parties, was to put in an effort trying to create an alignment with their flow of energy.

Now, this mindset is not the problem of gap in generations, only.
We face and see this weakness erupting at all levels of our interactions within our society.

Let’s talk about the concept of a normal Indian family. 

We, in India, have always believed in staying together, staying jointly, with all our kith & kins. And that has been going on since years.
Here too, the physical space in the house can be adjusted to, adapted to & compromised with. With mutual love & respect for each other in the home, we somehow manage within these limitations.

But what about the friction which arises due to different opinions, different perceptions, between school of old wisdom and the newly acquired education, due to weakness of external & internal influences, unequal intellect and of course the roots of personal ego which pulls and tightly holds these mis-matched perceptions?
Now these differences give rise to chaos, individual dis-satisfaction and eventually there is a crack in the relationships. And once the things get sour, the damage is ir-repairable.

So did we fail again? 

The only thing again, to have saved this situation to turn hostile could have been the effort to try and align with the mindset of the subjects concerned.
It’s not for only one person to put this effort, but everyone in the family, on an individual basis, could exercise and apply this within their capacities & abilities., and save the situation.

Let’s come out of our homes & talk about meeting newer and newer people every time we decide to move further on our mission in life.
We grow with few of our age-mates in school, in our building, in our locality and make a bond to become childhood friends.
We grow and add few more of the people in our wagon, based on our changing demands & priorities.
Don’t we see the friction here too, in our lives? 

The group of people who we have created, got associated with, made friends with, in different walks of life; somehow, someday, at some phase, at some moment does bring about friction and conflicts.
When younger and relatively uninfluenced & innocent, we had a natural way of aligning to different views, different opinions and thus the “unaware application” of alignment with the mindset.
But now when we move-on in life with different priorities and on the path to reach our goals and targets, anyhow-anyways, we lose this natural instinct.
Our Point of views become self-centric.
The see-saw gets tilted more towards how we would see the things, in fact, how we would like to see the things and make the situation turn in our way as how and what we wish.

Here unlike other losses, the damage is bigger.

The people who had emerged in our life, without any particular reason or mission, got closely bonded, and thus set for life-times; when passes through such conflicts; the situation thus emerges, may force us & throw us towards uncertainty in our respective lives of after-years, when the only joy in life would be to have such people around us with whom we can live through our years, happily and at peace.

Here too, applying wisdom, and putting in little efforts to understand different perceptions and view-points, however un-suitable or un-acceptable to us, could result in the alignment of the group mindset and help you to sail through, as a unit.

Talk about marriage & we have respective spouses taking call to live together in love for the entire life, with mutual respect for each other.
Ironically, the maximum cases of emergence of chaos is in this relationship of life. Why?
Did we ever try to actually reach the roots?

Without any doubt, the families and the people connected must have had tried their best to manage such mishaps and save & restore such situations since years.
But it’s still happening. Isn't it ?
In fact such cases of mutual dis-satisfaction & intolerance towards each other have increased exponentially.
Does that implies, whatever the theories and the equations tried, implemented & executed to prevent such an emergence has failed miserably?
Where are we failing in this?
An interesting point to note would be, that especially in these failures, the scope of reconcilement is minimal, in fact, very rare.

I believe, the problem lies elsewhere. 

This is one of the exceptional cases of application of alignment in the mindset.
What happens here is, that the couple is asked to or expected to get committed to each other, before actually they could work to work-out on such an association as a unit.
When a life time commitment is given or where a couple gets bound in such commitment for life, all the remaining aspirations and dreams of one partner, which are yet unfinished, are expected to be “obviously” supported and fulfilled by the other partner, the partner for life.
We all know that expectations lead to miseries. But the “obvious” attached to the expectations is more dangerous.
One tends to ask more and more , expect more and more, may be exceeding the other’s capacity to deliver or understand or manage.
Such an imbalance, at regular intervals, leads to a painful separation, never to be re-joined.

Moreover, as we all know that in this case, when one ties the knots and when the knot is released, both the times, the commitment taken under law (religious & constitutional), is irreversible.
We may can consider that in the earlier years, one of the genders, usually males, used to dominate, control and the better half used to and was supposed to exist under subordination. And so the power centre being one sided, conflicts were avoided or may be never dared to be raised as an issue.
Now when we are in the world and times of gender equality, the power rests in both the hands. And the individual desires and aspirations have ever since rose multi folds because of innumerable opportunities & choices.
And thus, still pulling along on the same line, with the same expected arrangement & expectations & much more, may not hold good for longer period of time.
One of the two would surely succumb to these external & internal pressures and give away.

So, let's contemplate what must be done to improve and avoid recurring of such situations?

Here, when a couple decides to spend their lives together, they need to have enough time and must try to create and adjust and align to each other’s mindset relating to the remaining life, which is to be lived together.
They mutually need to know, understand & be very well aware of the role one needs to enact pertaining to well defined responsibilities vis-a-vis role of the support system which is demanded & expected from the other.
We do understand that when it's the merging of two completely different human beings and as well as the families, few things are to be taken as granted and accepted by default.
But an effort to enhance the clarity is a must.
May be, in this case, if the mindset is set before the actual tie up, then the chances of falling apart of this institution can reduce a bit.

Thus, from the time we are ready to think about & understand the lives around us, we constantly need to work on this alignment of the mindset.
Not only it saves the meaning of people & situation in and around our lives, but helps us to unwind hidden potential within us to achieve higher and higher quality of life.
Once the concept is understood in its real sense, and the same is applied and exercised from time to time, the negativity, limitations and resistance in life is diffused.
And it paves way for a clear picture, a clear path which takes you only one way, and that’s FORWARD.

By - Sanjay Jogani
Mumbai. India.
sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com

Disclaimer
Mention about any person, place, event, picture, image or logo; is just for reference purpose to enhance the essence of writing for better presentation. It's not intended to trespass the rights of the original owners.

THE PURPOSE

The Purpose

There are times in our lives, when few things don't turn up the way we would want them to. Few things are in our control, where as few are destined to happen.

Few events are very sudden, unexpected and not to that of our liking & acceptance.
Few losses r unbearable and never to be compensated with anything else.
These are the shocks we live with. And as long as we are breathing we have to live with it, deal with it.
But then, there is THE SUPREME AUTHORITY above us all.
And HE has sent us with a REALIZATION.

HE says: "I sent you in this world as a completely detached individual with your own exclusive identity. I know what you are capable of. And thus, everyone of you are individually & respectively well-equipped to steer and drive your life."

Thus the realization which we all need to become aware of.
Implies - we have been sent here, in this universe, for a specific purpose.
A very important role to play.
The purpose to make complete & apt use of the life-years assigned to us.
The purpose to keep thinking & doing something, to make this world a better place to live, for the people who will come after us.
The purpose to devote our self to the good of every life which is around us and connected to us.
The purpose to gain & earn absolute knowledge whatever we can, by the way of learning from elders & gurus.
The purpose to move towards completeness.

And thus it's important that we realise sooner the "why" of our life.
Everyone has their own "why", but important is to know and understand this big question of life, as soon as possible.

We have our own separate identity.
We meet beautiful, wonderful people in this journey of life.
On the way, either we leave them or they leave us. But the real purpose of our lives, must never be lost.
We have full right to cry and feel bad, but then there is a time, there is a moment; when we need to recollect ourselves, brush off our tears, look around, get up and get back to the job for which we are here.
We need to find our music back.

The sooner we decide to collect & gather our shattered pieces, better its for our own life and also for people who are looking at us, towards us, with great hopes.

By - Sanjay Jogani
Mumbai.India.
sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com

Disclaimer
Mention about any person, place, event, picture, image or logo; is just for reference purpose to enhance the essence of writing for better presentation. It's not intended to trespass the rights of the original owners.

RAINS - BLESSINGS FROM HEAVENLY ABODE

Rains.....The blessings from Heavenly abode

Rains, Monsoon, showers…..

these words, by themselves generate a big sigh of relief, sudden burst of excitement, enthusiasm from within oneself and the smiles and laughter, irrespective of the biological clock one is tuned to. 

Actually every season, our country is blessed with, all are immense joy to be soaked into.
Every season eventually reaches its zenith, paving way to the next and simultaneously every life on the earth awaits the change with extreme passion, desire and urge.

The cold winter paves way for the flowery spring, the spring for the hot summer, the summer for the wet monsoon, the fall of autumn follows & then again back to the Winter.
The funniest part is, an irony as we say, we experience the peak in each of the season and desperately wait for the next to follow for a relief, and the same goes on for every turn of the change.

Monsoon, is my flavour of the time. 

Of course, besides the most romantic season of the lot, the season is dreaded for it's share of thunder showers with wild breeze, high tides, floods, landslides, tsunamis etc.
But nevertheless, the season, as is, continue to remain the darling of every living being on the earth.
The hot & scorching summer, which precedes the rains, not only boils up the earth, but the fiery fire also raises the temperatures of the lives, above & beneath the mother earth.

The man of today’s, is already a much stressed up commodity with its share of hardships, responsibilities, commitments & expectations.
He somehow tries in vain to keep creating magic by juggling & balancing all his rings to garner what he wants the most, the attention. But eventually, keeps dropping one to save another and lands up crashing.
Over & above, these disappointments, the extremities of heat outside his body fuels up his miseries.
And thus, when he sees passing clouds over his head, he rises in hope.
And as he feels few droplets of water on his body, his fingers stretches to feel the wet skin. And the sweet fragrance of the sand of the first rain radiating from the earth beneath enlivens the cells of his nose, otherwise dead.
He suddenly feels lighten up, as all the baggage of sorrows, miseries, anger; seem to get dissolved under the pouring sky.
He feels ONE with everyone around him. He starts loving every life, which shares the same joy as his, with every drop of rain on them.

He seems to be so relieved and freed to start looking at the sky,
..at the bathed up buildings,
..at the dancing leaves as if competing to take the most share of the blessings from above,
..at the swinging branches & the smiling trees holding them,
..at the children crazily jumping in the puddles,
..at the rhythmic running of the people with the umbrellas,

..at the small palms stretched out from the oversized raincoats of the school returning kids, trying to grab and store rain in their palms and feel it over their faces,
..at the people running out of their houses, on the streets, to be a part of the heavenly sight,
..at few elderly people sitting in their chairs of their balconies, getting smiles back on their faces, as if after years,

..at the honking and screeching sound from the moving cars, with half shut window panes, non-working wiper blades, and drivers struggling to keep their glasses clean.

For few of the travellers, it’s like getting late to reach to their destinations and for the few, the world has suddenly come to a halt;
For few it’s to avoid getting dirty in the muddy puddles and rains, whereas for few, it feels like a medicinal rush, draining out all their diseases and sins;
For few it’s the moment to shed tears of sorrows behind the running waters from above and for few it’s crying in happiness behind the same waters;

Here, I am, from a distant window of my room, getting soaked into all these sights emerging in front of me.
The feeling emerged in me, as if I know all these people. As if I know what they are passing through, what they are going through. I could relate myself fully to their part of joys and unhappiness. Their tears brought tears to my eyes and their smiles made those tears laugh.
And suddenly, It’s like, struck as a lightening thought,
“THIS TOO SHALL PASS”
 This moment of utter exhilaration, the life of these emotions, is here just for a short time. Just for a while.
Then, for what are we here on this earth?
The seasons never miss their virtue of right timing & extreme intensity. They are utmost sincere to fulfil their part of the duties and rightly deliver what they are expected to.
With every passing of the seasons, our hairs are getting greyer, the skin is getting crumpled, the vision is getting blurrier, the hands and legs are getting weaker, the brain cells are getting degenerated.
We can’t be just staring as a mere spectator to these wonderful blessings.
We can’t just stand in utter dumbness & blinded to these giving.
In fact, we need to be an active part of this changing phenomenon.
We need to be the change, ourselves.
We need to help rekindle the lives around us.
Few of the lives around us are living dead. We don’t need to wait for any seasons or occasions to bring them to life.
Let’s gather & store, a part of the attribute of every season, in our hearts and distribute the happiness and smiles to all, in all seasons.
It may can be mere extending one’s hand to reach to the other,
..may be just a matter of sharing a little time together.
..may be just a matter of silent listening for a while.
..may be just a matter of crying together, laughing together, celebrating together.

With a cup of tea in my hand, my eyes staring out of my window & my mind experiencing an absolute silence in the noisy surroundings, I suddenly felt the soft touch on my shoulder. I could feel warm wetness on my shirt, only to turn back and astonished to find my childhood friend, moved away from each other years back, standing there with his arms stretched in a rare combination of smiles and tears in his eyes.
I was overwhelmed, in awe with strange excitement & pounding heart beats. All the emotions experienced in the past few moments came rushing to the fore. With the tears in my eyes, I stretched my arms to hug him tight, so as never to be parted again and just in time, with a loud thunder & thud, heavy rains started pouring again.

And there, both of us rushed back towards my window, stretching our hands out and laughed at each other, as if, this moment of pouring rains, enlivened all the memories of our times together. :-)

By –

Sanjay Jogani

15th-June-2018 (revised & updated)

Mumbai. India.

Email - Sanjay.blogger.1210@gmail.com

Visit - sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com/in

Disclaimer
Mention about any person, place, event, picture, image or logo; is just for reference purpose to enhance the essence of writing for better presentation. It's not intended to trespass the rights of the original owners.

Let's not let our dreams die.....

Let’s not let our dreams die…

The History has witnessed, turning of years into decades & decades into centuries. But the speed, the pace with which we are witnessing the passing of the time since the beginning of 21st Century, has never ever been experienced before.
It's like, harder we try to grab it, hold it; faster it slips out of our hand.

Somehow, I personally feel, we have been blessed because of the slot of time frame of life allotted to us to play our part, to be able to enact our role & contribute our bit in the vast ocean of time, whose every passing moment adds to the wealth of History.
It somehow does mark & carries a significance & stamps an everlasting impression in the form of “My Life”; which of course is unique in its own way & doesn’t carry any similarity or comparisons, what so ever, with any other breathing soul above the earth & below the sky.

The “experiences” are generally “Grey” in its expression. It’s these shades of Grey which adds richness & beauty to every unit of time an experience in made of, making it a moment to treasure & cherish for.
Amongst us, who share the same platform of time frame, having lived out four decades of our journey, would most certainly agree to have seen more of what life had to offer, in its all possible colours, in its most versatile form.

I somehow have always believed that we are the passengers passing through the tunnel of transition. It is in this journey through the transition, we have experienced & continue to experience, the demands & expectations being raised & pressed, to be responded to, to be fulfilled, to be lived up to, to be met with.
It is during this journey, we were & are expected to hold, respect & support, which quite efficiently we have, the two generations above & two below us. If one sees through our times, carefully having a re-look on every growing year, may infer, that it was during these times in the near history the seeds in the form of stress on education, to perform, to compete, to prove got implanted.
Yes, it’s true that most of us, in our times, may not have had a clear vision , a well cut out goal, the idea, the plan to implement & execute; but were surely had got tuned into the race mode. Due to narrow outlook of & within the society in existence during those times, lack of awareness beyond one’s own world & deprivation of the global touch, the best which was expected from & out of us, was to get hold of a decently paid job, to inherit the family business, if any, or else were expected to do something worthwhile which would result in optimum use of our time & energy and help us make reasonable earning.

Due to limited resources and limited access to the world beyond, the thinking outside the box never happened. We started believing in working harder and the word “success” got quite easily & conveniently tagged to that with earning bucks.
Again, with no offence to our generations above, most of us got used to the mediocrity of life. Not that we were not reading about the world of dreams outside the wall of our well protected home, not that we did not dream about those dreams, but we couldn’t leave or bet on our atmosphere of convenience, to grow beyond.
We did have talent, we did have loads of creativity, we did have wings of imagination to fly with, but what we lacked was a long term, well crafted, well guided road map, to be able to have watered these plants into a fully grown tree. 

Fortunately, in the world, less demanding, most of us got settled into our respective lives, trying to balance out every aspect of being a responsible citizen, a responsible human.
But somewhere down within, we always carried the light of unfinished dreams. We never missed an opportunity to re-live those dreams with our eyes closed. Little did we know & anticipate the speed of passing times. And the rapidly changing times with increasingly clearer global view, struck a realisation of having missed few of the opportunities, few precious years, of our times, by not able to risk our comfort zones.
By then we already had the gen-next, our children, the young brigade gazing towards us, being responsible for them.
This did not seem like the time for us to turn back, trying to run in the pursuit to achieve & grab those unfinished dreams, to fulfil.
Not only are we responsible & accountable towards our present duties but are also expected to be the architect of the life of our children, whom we wouldn’t like to get imprisoned into a close restricted world.

Well aware of this, we being not able to carry the weight of our own dreams & desires, and in order not to lose sight of them, put them onto the shoulders of our children, the Gen-Next.
And here begins the conflict.
The frustration of our under-achievement gets reflected in our expectations from our children. We fight our lives out, trying to make them convinced about what’s right & what’s wrong for them, purely from our point of view based on our experiences. We enter into debates & arguments, resulting in bitterness, for not being able to penetrate through the wall of resistance.
Most of the times, what we perceive as a resistance, is merely, trying to dent into the wall of our own expectations. In being biased with our self view point, we fail to understand & touch their psyche.

As I said earlier, everyone is unique in their own way, in the way one puts use of their senses to experience the world around them. No one can live the experience of the other and thus can’t feel the emotions attached to it with the same frequency, intensity & depth.
Today’s generation have, in front of them, a pool of opportunities, choices & options to choose from. They have various medium of access to gather data, analyze them & put them into proper order & perspective to move towards their goal.
Unlike us, they are sharper, with much clear goal & vision & have means to achieve the same.
Unlike us, they not only dream with their eyes closed but chase them with their eyes open.
They are uniquely talented & having high intelligent quotient.
They don’t need to be compared with any other brains of their age. What is needed, is, to assure & ensure them that we are there, with them, for them, any time they need to turn to us for our love.
Just this sense of security, belief in self & elevated level of self confidence would make them fly over oceans in their full strength, rhythm & harmony. 

This mutual harmony would save us lots of our time & energy, at home & at work, to be able to pursue our desires & wishes justifying the notion that “Today is the first day of the rest of our life….”

Sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com: The Social Death....

Sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com: The Social Death....

The Social Death....

The Social death

In the early 1990s’, the first time, Indian economy was left open to the masses.
We can say, that was one of the first initiatives by India government to step into the experience of much bigger, much profitable global markets.
Till then, the first four and a half decades of Indian governance was mainly based on much restricted, much controlled business environment.

The initiative to decontrol, let loose was of course welcome by one & all. The Indian manufacturing sector suddenly had an easy access to the global demand, and be a part & a contributor into the global economic system.
And at the same time, the world raised its head to glance towards India as a much stronger and potentially dormant consumer & user of/for their products.

The nation, of course took a few years to absorb & get used to the changed equations of the world markets.
Along with the commerce & economics, it brought a radical change in the social configuration of Indian masses.
The influx of foreign goods, technology and an easy access to adapt, use & consume, the lifestyle related goods, created a sense of awe, amusement & surprise in the Indian social circle.
The financially blessed class could put their hands on the latest productions, almost at the same time with their foreign counterparts.

Besides the obvious craze & adaptations, came the biggest revolution for the people of India in the form of CONNECTIVITY.
It can be well claimed that the 2nd half of the decade of 90s’, made the world much smaller a space for us. It suddenly made the actual geographical distance seem to matter lesser & lesser.
Yes, here we are talking about the freedom to get connected, liberalization of the telecommunication world, internet & world-wide-web.
Though it made it’s late entry into India, was already a phenomenon, being made optimum use of, by developed economies of the West.

Now, leaving the last 2 decades behind us, let’s step into our todays’, the current times into the 2nd decade of 21st Century.

If we ask almost anybody in India, randomly, irrespective of caste, creed, color, religion, education, social class, financial standings; about their view point of last 20 years; are sure to get an unanimous response in the form of various steep, extreme, sudden changes being experienced by one & all, in the last a decade or so., precisely in the last 7-8 years.
Here we refer to the changes in the form of actually experiencing, in person, the Darwinism theory & principles of “Struggle for survival” & “Survival for the fittest”.
The Indian Socio-economic system has experienced all the vulnerabilities which came with the liberalization, as a package. The recessionary phase became a more frequent cycle, instead of once upon a time story.
But the biggest impact which struck the nation, was the unexpected change in the lives of the people. Liberalization did bring a change in the technical aspect, but without the people being made ready to embrace the same.
It was like too quick, too sudden.
The mentality, the attitude, the acceptance, the understanding was too immature to touch & feel the change through your hands. It went on like a slide-show which keeps you amused all throughout and not giving enough time to actually fix your senses & get attached to it.

As we know, one needs to start from kindergarten & spend the next 10 years, under gradual, systematic, cumulative advance to reach to the first competitive level of Std- X.
Here the Indian mass was exposed to & promoted much faster & thrown into the highly advanced times, with much less experience & maturity to actually deserve the stand.

Along with it came the increased polarization of the people in every sense of the term.
Most of us, I believe, must have experienced through the late night sweet stories from our parents & Grand-Parents about their times, where the words of virtue as “trust” , “security”, “hard-work”, “honesty”, “responsibility”, “adaptability” , “patience” ; always found repetitive mentions.
But frankly, these mentions are getting rarer with every passing day, today.
The trust is lost within families. Nobody can claim & feel fully secured. Hard-work is replaced by smart/quick work.
Honesty doesn’t earn money.
Nobody wants to take responsibilities on their shoulders and be accounted.
Patience is the hardest thing to put into practice & thus adaptability has become a rare case model.
The entire focus and efforts are being applied to earn more & more money & power to keep oneself an edge above all, to be happier, to feel more secured, and to maintain one’s social status.

It’s not bad to earn money, more money; but the compromises being done & means to achieve the same has forced man to stoop to an embarrassing level.
The principles & ethics are the matter being ridiculed and anybody referring to such terms is being considered a hypocrite. 
The innocent, immature, ill-experienced mind of a 10-12 year old in the late 90s’ was exposed to the lure of mobile phones & internet. Suddenly the world for them became of multiple choices and dreams generated to achieve the same, at any cost.

One morning, one day, and things changed for them.
The simple rustic laid-back child, the emerging youth started dreaming of reaching to the moon. And at the same time, came the realization that it’s a race and he/she needs to be one of the front-liners to touch the winning line.
THE RACE IS ON.
Winning at all cost attitudes is getting stronger.
Compromises being done.
Rules are broken.
Short cuts being discovered & implemented.
The innocence of the childhood met SUDDEN death. The physical senses got exposed to the medium much faster & much deeper than actual inner elevation of thoughts, education, action & thus the wisdom.
The medium of latest gadgets implanted in them the new level of desire, greed, dreams beyond the practical limits of nature. And the medium took complete control of their controlling system and made them increasingly non-sensitive towards much required social etiquettes, responsibilities & behaviors.
And this, somehow, I believe resulted in frequent recent non-human incidents of suicides, rapes, killings.
The fact that, the happenings like these are being considered at its peak, in recent times, shows the source , the root , around a decade and a half back, when the innocent minds were infused with various forces and made vulnerable.
I consider the late 90s’ as the time, the tipping point, of the socially destructive phenomena which we all are experiencing today.

Friends, the science, the technology, the evolution is not bad.
It’s a blessing for every living being on earth, if being used at the right time, with care & with respect to the nature around us.
Before the changes are being applied to serve the mankind, why not the social system, the biggest beneficiary, be made aware, made educated, and made to understand the pros & the cons?

Change is good. Change is welcomed. But the people, for whom the change is being brought about, should be the matter of subject on the first hand…..

#The images used are only for reference & understanding purpose and is sole proprietary right of the original owner.

The Push & Pull of life...

In the journey of passing through the life, we are being lured with many temptations. Some good, some bad. There are times when you can’t judge what’s right & what’s wrong for you. You tend to move on with the flow, the pull of the events, the pull of the people around you. But as we know & understand, nothing lasts forever. The experiences you have passed through, the actions you have taken, the behaviour you have conducted; seem to be standing at crossroads with your own self. You regret some , you embrace some , and you smile at some. The ones who create a sad feeling in within you are the ones which remain as ghost images and follow you like a shadow. It’s important to release these threads, the bindings, by making truce with the people, the events, the actions attached with such emotions. Unless you can make yourself completely detached & feel pleasantly released, you may not experience & live your life with the same passion, zeal & strongly positive emotions. The only way to break out of such negative formations, is to enter into mutually pardonable situations & make peace with the people, events & actions; responsible for such formations.

Time to Decide !!!!

Yesterday, I was driving, and the FM radio went off for few seconds. I thought, I should have an i-Pod. Then suddenly I realized that I have not used my i-Pod in last 6 months. And then more things possessed but unused, Handy-cam in last 2 years, Digi-Cam in last 2 months, DVD player in last 1 month & many more. Now I can say that I bought that Handy-cam just out of an impulse, as I have used it only once in last couple of years.
So, what’s wrong & where? When I look at myself or my friends, I can see it everywhere. We are not happy with what we have but are stressed and not happy for the things we don’t have. You have a Santro, but you want City; You have a City, but you want Skoda; just after buying a new phone, we need another one; better laptops, bigger TVs, faster cars, bigger house, more money. I mean, these examples are endless. The point is, is it actually worth?
Do we ever think if we actually need those things before we want them, buy them?
After this, I was forced to think what I need & what I don’t. May be I didn’t need this Hand- cam or the i-Pod or that DVD player. When I see my dad back at home, he has a simple BPL color TV, he doesn’t need 32”Sony LCD wall mount, he has a cell phone worth Rs 2,500. Whenever I asked him to change the phone, he always replied: It’s just a phone, I need this just for calls. Believe me, he is much happier in life than me with those limited resources & simple gadgets.
The very basic reason why he is happy with so little is that he doesn’t want things in life to make it luxurious, but he wants only those things which are making his life easier, convenient. There’s a very fine line between these two. But after looking my dad’s life-style closely, I got the point.
He needs a cell phone but not the i-Phone. He needs a TV but not the 32” plasma. He needs a car but not an expensive one.
Initially I had lot of questions.
I am earning good, still I am not happy...why ?
I have all luxuries, still I am stressed...... why ?
I had a great weekend, still I am feeling tired...... why?
I met lot of people &thought over it again and again, I still don’t know if I got the answers, but certainly figured out few things. I realized that one thing which is keeping me stressed is the stay-connected syndrome. I realized that, at home too, I am logged in on messengers, checking mails, using social network sites, and on top of that, the windows mobile is not letting me disconnected. I realized that I am spending far lesser money than what I earn, even then I am always worried about money and more money. I realized that I am saving enough money I would ever need, Still I am stressed, worried & in secured about job, salary and spendings.
May be, many people will call this approach a non-progressive attitude, but I want my life back. Ultimately it’s a single life, a day gone is a day gone. I believe, if I am not happy tonight, I’ll never be happy tomorrow morning. I finally realized that meeting friends, spending quality time with your loved ones; spending time with yourself is the most important thing. If on Sunday you are alone & you don’t have anybody to talk with, then all these luxuries of life, all this money is wasted. May be, cutting down on your requirements & wants, re-calculating your future goal in the light of today’s happiness is a worthwhile thing to do. May be selling off your Santro & buying a Honda City on EMIs is not a good idea.
I believe putting your happiness ahead of money is the choice we need to make.
I think, a lot can be said and done but what we need the most is re-evaluation of the value of happiness and time we are giving to our life and people associated with it.
Change does not Happen when Circumstances Improves......
Change happens when YOU Decide to Improve YOUR circumstances !

Sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com: "Where the mind craves for peace" **

Sanjay-jogani.blogspot.com: "Where the mind craves for peace" **

"Where the mind craves for peace" **

"PEACE of MIND"
seems we've left far behind;
Can't find it in my hind(sight);
May have lost it, in my Mind..............

The world is growing, life so fast;
In the attempt to measure, space so Vast;
Wonder when did I stop counting stars, last?
Lost track & the stars too, in the sky so overcast(Pollution)......

We are humans with a little heart & a little mind;
which leaves all other species behind;
Once,We could boast,
for d heart, which could feel & d mind, which could create; Coloring world so Pink..
Today,
Mind still creates, but the noise of destruction makes our hearts Sink......

Man today, needs a bigger space to live within;
They are eye-ing Mars sitting on the Moon;
The greed for one more home, away from home;
I would call it a "CURSE" not a "BOON"...................

In our Motherland (India), Family, culture & values
still are being hold the Highest..............
(over)ambition of building walls away from our corners;
have seen the fall of the Mightiest...............

Let our parents be the Earth & we be the Moon around them;
Our Children be the stars, shining & smiling, all around us........
With the sky so clear & hearts so near; we don't need more Jupiters;
Let we be the world & not the world for us...................

At last, I found the PEACE in my Mind;
within the FRIENDS so close & kind;
Lets stop the chase of Rat & Mouse;
And make a "HOME" out of our "HOUSE"........